In setting goals, it is important to:

• Understand what you want to achieve

Setting goals demands you to become specific. Wishful thinking will not bring results but deliberately setting the goal and pinpointing possible hindrances is important as this informs the goal and what needs to be done to attain it.

• Ensure your goals are measurable

Accomplishing your goals requires them to be placed in structural sections. This means assigning them in a daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly fashion. As you achieve a goal it is important to be so structured to be able to move right into hitting the target for the other goal.

• Develop time frames for your goals

Apart from creating measurable goal periods, setting a time limit is relevant. Setting target dates boost the process as it keeps you focused on taking the necessary steps to be successful within the stipulated time frame.

• Own your goals

When setting your goals be sure that they are what you want for your life. Personal goals should never be entangled in the dreams of others. Personal goals need the drive of your desire and passion to be accomplished.

• Write your goals

Getting your goals out of your head and unto paper may seem non-sensical but that’s where the progress begins. As you write your goals down on paper be sure to include the steps. The use of a goal tracking worksheet also proves beneficial in the process. 

• Visualize your goals

After writing your goals it’s good to be able to visualize and meditate upon them. This helps you to focus on your goals intently and picture yourself achieving them. Being able to see yourself as successful is important.

• Be committed

Regardless of the distractions that will come stay focused and stick to the process of accomplishing your goals. During the weaker moments of your journey to achieving your goals remember why you started and use it to stay motivated. Choose to visualize your goals instead of moping on the possible setbacks.

• Team up

If possible, set up a system of accountability with a close friend. Meeting to sit and talk over your goals can be very encouraging as you act as each other’s support system on this journey.

• Say no to procrastination

Keep yourself situated and busy in the right now steps that will push you closer to your goal. Choose to do them now instead of putting them off until later. What you choose to do today will allow you to accomplish something new tomorrow. Create the habit of ticking all the items from your checklist. Momentum is key to limit the presence of procrastination.

• Celebrate

Don’t only celebrate the big goals but find time to celebrate the small goals as well. Always remember that to reach the big goals you must accomplish the small goals. Ticking items off your to-do list deserves a celebration as this too awards your actions and motivates you for the future.

• Always find the time to revisit your goals

The process of revisiting normally informs the refinement of goals. Goals can change, be modified, or even dismissed. The important step is to remain connected to them throughout all the phases.

• Be consistent

Knowing what you want to accomplish is important but sticking through and to the process is important. Being consistent is a daily effort that will lead to success. Practical steps to becoming consistent might include:

• Pinpointing and breaking down barriers
• Effectively using calendar prompts
• Using a progress tracker sheet
• Improve your environment to harbor success
• Start small and stick to one task at a time
• Utilize the time-blocking technique
• Be positive
• Find time for self-care
• Eat healthily and sleep well
• Don’t delay
• Journal

• Dismiss self-doubt

Self-doubt destroys all dreams and goals before they even get the chance to be accomplished. The practice of being positive gives you a chance to embrace the future success that awaits you. Spend the time to build self-confidence that will fuel positive actions. Setbacks will happen but this does not permit you to doubt yourself. In the presence of set-backs push smarter.

It’s now time to ensure you smash those goals with confidence! Depending on the area of your life you have set goals for accomplishment, the how-to might be different. Whether it be financial, physical fitness, spiritual, education, career, family, and social aspect utilizing these steps will ensure success.

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THE CHALLENGES

On any given day, a mother’s day begins at the on and off cries of her baby. As this baby grows, the mother will be back within her regular work routine whether is at home or on site. Only three months or less is often allotted to working mothers who go on maternity leave. Now let’s be serious, not even the mother’s body is back within three months, but somehow we must make it work. At this point, you must figure out your childcare situation- a trusted daycare center, a nanny may be hired, family or the baby is being cared for throughout the day by the mother with little to no help. Mothers going back to work, if breastfeeding, have to figure out their milk expression situation and setup at their place of work. Mamas learn quickly how to use her hours wisely between baby naps when situated at home. Many times in this period of a mother’s life, cold meals become the new daily normal.

‘Mom-Guilt’

The mother who decides to go back to work and leave her child to be taken cared by a nanny, daycare or a trusted somebody, is faced with varying degrees of emotions. Feelings of anxiety and depression can arise for feelings of uncertainty about your mom abilities and your child. The guilt becomes pronounced when worry sets in and you believe that you haven’t lived up to certain expectations for your child; it can be emotionally taxing. Mom-guilt is common, but the type of feelings that manifest are different for each mother. For me, when I went back to work after having my second child, I was so emotional and I could not even believe that I left this baby at home and she was less than three months!  At that time I was working a night shift and my worries became so much at a certain part of the night, that I asked to leave early from work. I returned home to find my husband wide awake sitting on the couch holding the baby at 3:00 in the morning. My goodness!

For some mothers, the help of childcare is the only reason they’re able to juggle parenting and their career, the creeping thought of their child spending too much time with the nanny or the ruminating thoughts of doing all you can to bond with your child. It’s natural to experience these feelings because they guide your actions and helps you to keep improving.

Self-Care 

Sometimes it may be challenging to remember to take time for yourself, but you must be deliberate about making time to do so. Many times mothers face burnout as a result of a lack of self-care. You need a break and time to reenergize. The demands of each role can have you feeling like it will never end! So make plans to do somethings for you. Go workout or do yoga (if you’re into that). For me, I love to get pedicures and I love GOOD massages, even the free ones given to me by my husband. You better believe those are always on my agenda! Do you want a drink? Go and get one. Are you into facials? Go make that appointment! Nobody is going to love you better than you love yourself. 

Family-Time

After you squeeze time in for you. You have to make room for those folks in your family. Finding time for the family is very important. Time may not always allow for long drawn-out get-togethers, but as busy and demanding is the life of a working mother, engage in family time activities. On any random evening, my family and I play board games like monopoly, Uno, and Janga. We also have movie nights, dance to music, color, play tic tac toe or simply just go outside when the weather permits. You should cherish these moments with your family, because before you know it your kids will have their own schedules and do their own thing.

MOTHERLY EXPECTATIONS

Moms are expected to rise to the occasion of all the tasks placed before her. Without questions asked, moms find a way always to make it happen, sometimes even at the expense of sleep, meals, alone time, or even taking showers. Mothers only understand how to excel even when facing tremendous pressure from work and loved ones. The support may not always be present, but she is going to make planning her tool to help balance parenting and her career. I just pray that with it being 2021, someone gets it in their noggin that, all these expectations are unreasonable and more support for the mothers are needed! In the meantime, we can find ways to manage.

Juggling Motherhood and Career

Even though us mothers can be “strong”, we need to appreciate accepting our commitments and limitations. We should:

1. Review our goals
2. Ask for help
3. Learn to delegate tasks

4.Make self-care a priority

5.Practice self-compassion

6.Do daily positive affirmations

7.Be present in the moment, the here and now

8.Become self-aware

9. Use a planner to stay organized
10. Know your values and commit to them

Understand that this motherhood-career juggle is a learn-on-the-job experience. It’s a job that still does not have a standard handbook. It requires you to be proactive, plan, sleep, find alone time, and socialize with friends and family and giving yourself grace. Don’t feel pressured to have to do overtime or to cook ALL the time. The best gift a mother can be gifted or gift herself is to take a break before you breakdown. Mothers continue to be superheroes as they tackle the challenges of juggling parenting and career. With the right tools in place you can help yourself complete your goals, especially when you have support from your loved ones.

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https://bible.com/bible/114/rom.8.28.NKJV

I was having the best time of my life in college. My academics were on point and I was experiencing life. After finding out that I was pregnant, I went into hiding, I dropped classes, and it felt as though, little by little, my dreams and life were further away from what I had imagined them to be. In a matter of just seconds everything was broken down and in a mess. Life was not as I would have it.

At one point, I contemplating my decision to have this kid as such a tenderoni age. I found myself in mental anguish and cried to God, “Man, God I am so sorry for disappointing you! This was not really the plan.” God listened. And then, He spoke to my heart.

I am saving you.

The audacity of this statement was almost comical- I did laugh at the moment I actually found out I was pregnant though. There was nothing about what I was going through that even remotely resembled rescuing.

Hollllyyyy, I rescued you from the version of the dream you thought you needed…No worries though, I will redeem the best version of your dream.

This guarantee, that God would redeem my dreams and restore my life, gave me hope that my current situation would get better.

Be patient, my child, your time is coming.

I know God now to be a redeemer. I have experienced his goodness front and center. First, he redeemed my story of shame and academic setbacks and used my graduating college and pharmacy school to reach other women and single mothers. Today, after endless dating life escapades, I can tell you that he has redeemed my dream for a God-given husband and family to be restored. On May 2, 2015, I was married to a marvelous man (with a handsome son) who is an amazing, caring, bonus father to my beautiful daughter! In February of 2016, we had a sweet baby girl together who has brought so much joy to our home. This birth is followed by the births of our daughter and son in 2017 and 2019. We are now a family of seven! I cannot believe it!

I love the story of David, because it’s a story of a dreamer who trusted God, even when it appeared that trials after trials were testing his dreams. He was a man on the run, his wife given to another man, his family displaced, he was surrounded by disgruntled men and he was sought after to be killed. Even through all of this, God was with David. Ultimately, he was a man after God’s own heart and it allowed him to rise above his circumstances, achieve the dream and ultimately be crowned king! God used every single bit of David’s life for good! God fulfilled the dream.

I would not have blamed David for being tempted to give up the dream after all that he went through. Instead, he stayed steadfast and faithful throughout all of his seasons and circumstances, allowed God to use him, and kept chasing down his dreams. He was one of the greatest kings in Israel. “We must also grow up in our faith to trust in His direction through the dark pathways of life.” -1 Samuel 23:6, 12-14.

Today, I am here today with four degrees in hand and 1 on the way and I am forever grateful for this opportunity. I, together with my husband, are building an empire, building a legacy and taking advantage of the second chance (or many chances) given to us by God. And you know what, He’s not done with me yet.

I don’t know what you are going through. I don’t know what kind of trials or tribulations that you have gone through to get to this point. But I do know this—God will follow through with your dreams in His timing. He is faithful. As you keep dreaming, keep trusting, keep working, keep persevering and your dreams will come true. And that’s on God.

“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” -Philippians 1:6.

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Finding your purpose is a journey that involves self-reflection, taking note of the views of others, and learning your passions. It requires you to remain consistent and allow these experiences daily to shape and mold your dreams and visions. The experiences you have will expose your true purpose and desires over time. Here is a list of activities that can prompt your purpose:

1. Helping others. This is a healthy habit that can be used to expose your purpose. Learning the beauty of giving can open possible doors to connect you with what you truly love. This can include volunteering, donating funds, or helping just about anyone daily.
2. Be receptive. At times with all the influences present, you are unable to recognize the things you are passionate about. With an extra pair of eyes from someone who you trust, you might be able to pinpoint your true purpose. This is so because many times we display our true self and desires around the ones we love. They are better able to highlight some of the traits you have buried for years or have turned a blind eye.
3. Enjoy the presence of positively charged people. This encourages you to engage in things that allow you to feel passionate and purpose-filled. The positive influence of others around you creates an environment that will allow you to become your best self.
4. Meet new people. Social media has become the go-to for communication. However, conversing with the persons also in your physical surrounds will cause you to learn by opening your mind to new opportunities, activities, and projects that may be of interest to you.
5. What are your interests? Pay attention to the things you passionately share and speak about regularly on social media. Whether it be finance, farming, beauty, weather, or current affairs. Pay attention to the activities that you engage in regularly. This will help to expose and understand the things that motivate you and gives you purpose in your life.
6. Do you know the injustices that affect you? Many times, the things that motivate us to accomplish something or create a movement is out of the things that bother us and make us gravely disgruntled. For some persons, it’s welfare programs, opportunities to provide scholarships, or the ability to build a rehab or health center. Your personal donation could be in the form of money or time.
7. Establish what you love to do. You can easily discover your purpose by spending time with yourself thinking and pinpointing what you love to do. This may expose talents, skills, and passions that you didn’t even realize exist. Spending the time to highlight all the things you love to do than analyze how you can use your passion to develop it into something big or provide you with satisfaction.

Upon acknowledging and bonding with your purpose it’s pertinent that you set the goals necessary to keep yourself and aligned and motivated to accomplish them. This means journaling will become your best friend as you document all your goals as well as the progress you make daily to achieve them. This will allow you to keep track of yourself and embrace the vision you have developed for yourself. The more you can work at your goals and be present while you observe your development it’s the more empowered you will become.

Trusting your journey means sticking to your goals and plans even when things may seem as if they are falling apart. It means going back to your goals list and ensuring you are on target with all you need to do daily.

Trusting your journey means believing in your capabilities to accomplish what you set out to do. It means embracing possible setbacks and challenges as you seek to find your purpose. It means challenging yourself to become the best you. It means falling in love with yourself, building your self-esteem, and self-confidence.

To empower yourself as a woman means to take time to care for yourself every day. Living a purpose-filled life demands that you learn to put yourself first by spending time in your own presence and loving it!

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